I wish I spent more time online

I wish I spent more time online

My only true regret

Consuming endless media

I remember to forget

What the world outside

Had promised me was never meant to last

So I still console myself at times

By rummaging my past

In which I find a rusty self

Corroded by the years

Way behind my hopes and dreams

Ahead of most my peers

I compare myself to him and her,

their happiness, their joys

Them doing all the things I want

Instead I research toys

For no apparent reason

I just justify my job

wasting academic efforts

Molding children into cogs

Writing poems during working hours

Pissing off the staff

I convince the kids, I care for them

I always make them laugh

I’m aware enough of what to do

They need me more than me

They can’t afford to fire me

I’m always off the weed

If you’re always high they’ll think you’re not

You fooled them and yourself

No one cares about your habits

They hired you to help