sound of mind, in theory

This is the story of a guy who projected his own repressed homosexuality onto the world and produced countless theories, hypotheses and speculations as to why men act the way they do, what conditions lead to compulsive repetition of abusive behavior, and where the main difficulties lay in addressing patriarchal structures from the comfort of a safe space often not granted to the many working poor which he often thought about, but never really considered himself part of, given his rather fortunate and loving upbringing, the source of a guilt he knew he felt, but couldn‘t rid himsef of, as he knew that it was a two-pronged blade of catholic institutionalization and the pain of having left the countryside with no preparation for an urbanized global village that produced emancipation through subjugation, castration, or the ill-guided fate of many happy few who wouldn‘t instantly agree with his stipulations, bickerings, sermons, rants, rebukes and rebuttals, many of which he had carefully memorized from websites that he deep down, he knows he shouldn‘t be using, but nonetheless will, because he‘d often quote jokes from there and everybody laughed, thinking he was funny, when really he just remembred things and tested them for feedback at parties, like a crook at a focus group, a preacher to the choir of thieves, who do it all the same, but wouldn‘t admit it, to him or themselves, because, at least this is what he sometimes thinks, they may be repressing some urges, unlike him, of course, who‘s always sound of mind, in theory.